The decision to get married should be taken because it is yourself who decides to get married, not for reasons caused by other people. Get married if you really want and are ready, that’s a phrase that is often said by many people. Holding a wedding is not easy, there are many things that must be prepared. If you’re not ready, there’s nothing wrong with waiting a little longer. To be sure, do not let other people interfere with your decision to marry or not to marry. Here are some reasons you shouldn’t be in a hurry to get married.
1. Feeling Bad Refusing Marriage Invitation
Before marriage, you will definitely go through a stage called dating. After dating for some time, then an invitation appears to step into a more serious relationship, namely marriage. Invitations to marriage can be made from men or women. If both parties agree, then think about what to prepare for marriage.
When one of the parties has made an invitation to get married, here there is still a choice to accept or refuse. Don’t accept an invitation to marry just because you’ve been dating for a long time and it’s not good to refuse a boyfriend. If it’s not ready then it’s better to say it’s not ready. Don’t push yourself and also be a people pleaser.
2. Money
It is undeniable that money is one of the important things that a person considers when getting married. The more you come here, the cost of living is increasing, if your finances are not stable it will be bad for yourself and your family life. That’s why not a few people are looking for a partner based on how much money they have.
Making money as an excuse to get married quickly is not a good choice. There must still be consideration before making a decision to get married. If you have a lot of money but your partner is stingy, it’s useless for you to get married. Or, a rich couple but has bad traits such as looking down on people whose economy is at the bottom and treating people like they want is also not a good trait.
3. Lonely
Not a few people get married for reasons of loneliness. They feel that with a lifelong partner this loneliness problem will disappear. Making the problem of loneliness a reason to get married is also not the right choice. You can’t completely put your hope in your partner.
To overcome loneliness do not depend on others. You are the one who must try to find a solution to overcome the loneliness. Make yourself happy before you decide to get married. Not all problems can be thrown at your partner to find a solution.
4. Married Siblings
For some families, it is forbidden for an older brother to step over his sister to marry first. Maybe this is considered rude or could bring bad luck, who knows. The problem does not stop there, if a brother or sister gets married first then the next pressure will be felt by his brother. Like it or not, his brother must get married soon, too.
Marrying because your brother or sister is already married is definitely not a wise choice. Usually this pressure will be felt more when the brother or sister is married and immediately blessed with children. Parents will usually urge us to also get married soon. Old man says don’t want to lose to your brother. Is this a race to get married or what?
5. Sex
You need a reason to get married. There are many reasons that encourage someone to get married, one of which is because of sex. This sex can also be described more, for example, because you have a high lust that you can’t hold back, so it’s better to get married so you don’t have sex with other people.
If you want to get married for this reason, it’s best to postpone your wish. Sex is not an easy activity to do. Sex does not only involve the body but also emotions. If the emotions of one of the parties are not stable, it is better to get rid of the desire to get married first. In some religions, sex and marriage are things that must be respected. Do not let later after marriage, sex is not as desired and then divorced.
6. Want to have children
There are also people who marry because they want to have children. Indeed, when asked there are those who want to have children and some who do not. Let’s get rid of couples who are married but don’t want or don’t want to have children. Couples who marry because they want to have children can be understood because with the presence of children it is usually recognized that the family is complete.
Not only that, parents also hope that their children will quickly have children so they can carry their grandchildren. Marriage must be because of the desire of oneself and not because of the reason to quickly have children. Because you want to have children too much eventually make you rush to make a decision to get married so that you don’t dig deeper into what the nature of your partner is can have a bad effect not only on you but also on your children
7. Age
Another bad reason used to get married is age. When you reach a certain age, usually at the age of 30 and over, you will feel that you are old and it is time to get married. Or if that feeling doesn’t come from yourself, usually parents, relatives, and friends say that we are old and should get married soon.
Marriage doesn’t have to look at someone’s age. At any age people are free to marry. But indeed if you get married at an old age, then the effect will be less likely to have children because of the age factor that makes the body’s function decline and in women there will be such a thing as menopause. But getting married quickly also doesn’t mean the right choice and makes you quickly have children.
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8. Want
Everyone has a dream about the ideal and perfect marriage. Some want to get married outdoors in a park, some want to get married abroad, some want to get married under the sea, and so on. It’s okay to have all those dreams, but don’t let you decide to get married so that you can achieve that dream. Or even forcing the couple to make the dream of the perfect wedding come true.
The dream of having a perfect marriage cannot be created just like that. It takes a lot of preparation and is difficult depending on what kind of wedding you want. Are you sure your partner is able and willing to do such a marriage? Instead of forcing immediate marriage to create a dream wedding and later it can have bad consequences, it’s better to wait for more mature preparations before deciding to realize your wedding dreams.
9. Many Friends Married
Often, seeing lots of wedding invitations sent from friends can make someone also want to get married quickly. Especially if you see a lively wedding party from the friend, the more it encourages the feeling to get married. Even if it’s a close friend, it’s better to stay away from thoughts that encourage you to get married soon.
Friends get married maybe because they are ready and prepare everything carefully. Anything that is done in a hurry without thinking will usually lead to unwanted events. Especially when it comes to getting married, there are many people who will be involved in this important event. Make sure not only you are ready but also the people involved are ready.
10. Parental Pressure
The biggest challenge to get married soon will come from parents. It will be difficult for children to be able to reject their parents if they have asked to get married immediately. If they refuse, usually parents have various ways to make their children comply with their requests. Starting from parents wanting to carry grandchildren, reasons to be filial to parents, reasons for your age being right for marriage, and also fighting against your parents is a sin.
If you really don’t want to or are not ready to get married, be brave enough to say no, even if it’s to your own parents. If you are in a hurry to get married and it turns out that you have chosen the wrong partner, there will be a divorce trial that will take time and money. Not to mention the addition of what is called the division of wealth. It’s all we will also live it. It’s just that, daring to say no to parents will obviously carry its own risks. The choice is yours. Are you willing to sacrifice your own happiness for your parents by granting their wish to get married soon?
